Tale of Two Cities
By Tatiana Pahlen
Since De Blasio was recently crowned Mayor of New York, strange things began happening on the Upper East Side. Despite announcing his relocation to the Gracie Mansion, a residence reserved for the elected Hizzoners since 1942, he still holes up in his Park Slope, Brooklyn house. He is chronically late to every official event, showing disrespect and arrogance written all over his disengaged face! The city suffered two major Nor’easters and, naturally Park Slope was plowed in no time, while no plowing was done in Manhattan! Right now East Siders suffer huge mountains of snow spruced up with garbage bags as high as the Hi-Rise Towers! De Blasio vindictiveness towards the East Siders has no limits.
On Saturday, February 16, I dined in Midtown in the tiny Italian restaurant with a great cuisine, Radicchio on 53 Street, and to my amazement I didn’t find a trace of snow within several blocks. Where did it go? It can’t melt right after the storm in the freezing temperature, especially the new artificial snow. As you may be aware by now, many videos emerged on YouTube showing a suspicious snow, which didn’t melt even after burning with a blowtorch! The foul smell suggested there were elements of plastic! It didn’t leave any water, but oddly would melt in hands. NASA’s mad scientists made us guinea pigs experimenting their lethal new trend. One source revealed the white substance, an alleged snow, was spiked with plutonium particles! If you suddenly experienced a nosebleed, fatigue or diarrhea that’s the cause! Avoid any contact with it like a plague!
Last Friday, January 21, I was in the West Village trying a new trendy hot spot, “Onegin” and again was shocked. I could not locate a speck of snow or any garbage bags! Of course, it’s the neighborhood of De Blasio’s pals and his largest fundraisers!
On Saturday, January 22, I passed by the Gracie Mansion, situated on 88th Street on my way to the Carl Schurz Park! The place looked unusually dirty, surrounded by icy hardened snow. For those who don’t know the park, it was featured in Spike Lee’s movie, “25th Hour,” starring Edward Norton and recently departed and forever loved by many, Philip Seymour Hoffman!
The boardwalk was no better: huge puddles everywhere with blackened snowdrifts pushed aside.
I stopped at my favorite place, the tiny dog run around 84th Street to watch the little pooches. The place was a mess! I wish I had a camera to document it. The pups were sliding all over in a rush to catch their playing balls. Two little tykes, I assume no older than seven, a girl and a boy were struggling with larger than their heights shovels, pushing the piles of snow into the corner. The playground restricts visitors without the dogs to enter it! I stood and watched in disbelief! What happened to the park keepers? It never looked so bad under any other mayor! And where is PETA? It’s an obvious abuse and endangerment of the animals!
As I continued my stroll, I noticed the snow was removed from the walk area around 83th Street. Nevertheless, when I exited the park, the streets were under the snow again.
De Blasio who famously warned the upscale residents about redistribution of their wealth began with redistribution of the snow! Was the removed snow from Midtown and West Village dumped on the East Side? We need the answers! The East Side is blocked for entrance by the walls of snow! So, what’s up, De Blasio? Looking for creative ways of retribution? Yes, we didn’t vote for you and loathe your lackadaisical agenda! Get to your senses before we wipe your disdainful smirk from your frozen-in-time grimace. We shall demand to keep you accountable for springing your criminal crony Bishop Orlando Findlayter out of jail.
You are not above the law, mister! Pick up the rotting garbage and start plowing the black snow from our curbs. Enough is enough!
Mayor De Blah Blah
By Tatiana Pahlen
The story starts with a cunning mot
Who went to embrace her future Knight
Mayor De Blasio,
whom she seduced while being a lesbian;
Produced him two offspring
A boy and a girl who helped pitch
A calculated Mayoral bridge.
By pimping Dante with an overblown Afro,
Mot easily cleaned up all the black votes,
Then gays and lesbians!
The whole idea to tax the rich
To help breed the pre-K list,
De Blasio tried to outwit
Cuomo over a pizza lunch,
where Hizzoner consumed his slice,
using a questionable fork and knife.
His wife is an ambitious shrew
Enrolled as The Head of his Mayoral Fund,
After she hired the pricey aid
The former pal of Al Sharpton.
The family lives in Park Slope, Brooklyn
Pretending they moved into the Gracie Mansion
No wonder the streets of the Upper East Side
Filled with putrefied garbage!
His vindictive oversight is raw
to punish the residents of the East Side
Who didn’t fancy him as a Hizzoner,
since he insisted in installing a large waste dump
Next to “Asphalt Green” and a schoolyard
What kind of brain could come up with this?
Attached to the fancy High-Rise towers,
The wealthy residences of the East Side
In the past were his largest donors,
betrayed by the egomaniac,
who literally came from nowhere!
Imagine the waste that will breed diseases
Will kill the neighborhood for years to come,
Including the big portion of Gracie Mansion!
Whoever brandished this odious man
Should be held without bail!
February 7, 2014
Copyright © 2014 Tatianyc. All Rights Reserved.